Teach for the needs @ HWUM

Remember about those kids from Kampung Orang Asli near Dengkil? Yes the one that we helped building for them a corner of knowledge; basically a mini library set up in an abandoned balai raya of the village. 

I was rushing back then, going back to Cyber coz that day was hell tiring. And there was this notice board just near the lift button that really triggered me. An advertisement about another kinda volunteering, but this one will be focusing more on tutoring. Have I ever mentioned that I have always wanted to be a teacher? Well, I guess if I wasn't to be an accountant, then maybe being a teacher is what I'm gonna be enrolling by now. Haha. 

But, I didn't expect that the kids that we'll be teaching is the same kids we built the library for. I guess, it's an opportunity to contribute something to the same group though not much, still, education changes a lot. I'm passionate about education, seriously. I think, apart from any other things in the world, education is indeed a powerful and effective  mechanism to build a better nation. Something that I cannot tolerate is when someone take off a privilege for a good education, especially from the young people who are passionate for that. Even at times when a country is at the peak of downturning, I would still firmly stay by education. Education, should not be something to be less prioritized. It is, a main priority; despite all. 

So as what being told from the core organizer of this programme, this tutoring programme is actually different. It is a solution to an issue, as to what I understand. If 'teaching for excellent' is something you have in mind (by which, I had too), then deny it, because it's another thing we're leading to as a goal. We are here to motivate, to give whatever we have, to boost their inner fading spirit so that they can rise up again. 

Without focusing of what actually the factor, please know that if they were 10 children who currently in Standard Six getting ready for UPSR, it'd just be not even half of them managed to be in Form One later for Secondary school. It is depressing, to know the fact that they are going to stop their education only until primary school just because they think there is no use for further education. They don't feel the need to. It prolly be because of the norm of their society that education to them, will affect nothing better for their life but another cost to be added. 

This is one-to-one tutoring programme. Every volunteer is assigned to one kid. It's really brilliant I guess, because every kid that come to us will have full focus and commitment from us ourselves.

So here what we are going to do, to give. If the thing they would need is light, then we are pleased to give them light. 

Yesterday was my week one. We have altogether three planned weeks of tutoring session, but it will be more than a bonus for us to keep tutoring them for the following weeks on demand basis. By that, it's subjected to our willingness to keep following them up. As it was very first week, a kind of ice-breaking session is done. And it was also a session for us to diagnose their potential and weakness so that we know at what stage they are at. Thus, we made them to take bahasa melayu and english test. Also, we are given their recent exam result.

Mine is a girl, a 12-years old girl of course. She's quite shy, or maybe because it was a week one idk. Before the session ended, we made a promise. We both made a promise to ourselves, and hopefully in week three we gonna achieve all those promises we made. InsyaAllah. 

For more weeks to come with them, I hope their life will be more lighten up. I may not come from the best education background, but I believe education isn't to what level you are going. It isn't the university you attend, or what course you're taking. It is a lot more, it is an obligation for oneself. It should be seen as a process, a never-ending one. It is indeed, a need that requires willingness. If I could exaggerate, I would call education as the way of life. Because education makes you think differently. Education changes how you see something from another; that's perspective. 

The goal of education is not to increase the amount of knowledge but to create the possibilities for a child to invent and discover, to create men who are capable of doing new things. - Jean Piaget

poskad janggal

Malam ini janggal; 

Yang ada hanya timbunan thesis, tulisan, secangkir kopi malas,

dan ingatan ke arah kamu. 

...

Aku cemburu sama halusnya tulisan Spanish Pablo Neruda;

yang banyak dibaca oleh orang -orang 

waima hanya dalam alihan bahasa. 

Ternyata bahasa cinta itu halus, di alih bahasa juga karyanya tetap kedengaran sama bagus. 

Tetap sampai. Tetap mampu membuat jiwa mereka bergolak macam lautan luas yang hendak tumpah. 

Aku cemburu sama konsistennya tulisan Kahlil Gibran; 

Apa dirinya takpernah dikecewa

Apa jiwanya takpernah diluka 

Tulisan cintanya selalu saja bahagia, selalu saja kedengaran agung dan ikhlas 

Sedangkan, dalam diri aku; itu berbeza

cinta selalunya soal kecewa dan luka. Kahlil Gibran ternyata orang yang selalu ikhlas dan bahagia.

Aku cemburu sama mapannya tulisan Paulo Coelho, 

Yang ternyata dia sang pemimpi yang jarang sekali berputus asa

Setiap kata kata yang ditulis adalah inspirasi

Jarang sekali aku diberi kata dua soal terus bermimpi

Kerana untuk terjaga; kau seharusnya bermimpi dahulu. 

Kerana dia, aku juga mahu jadi sang alchemist. 

Aku cemburu sama hebatnya tulisan Jalaludin Al Rumi, 

Melalui abjad abjad yang tertulis; Tuhan dirasakan begitu dekat

Saat jiwa diluka sama orang, kau tahu Tuhan cukup adil untuk takkan buat kau begitu

Kerana cinta Tuhan itu bukan tunggal, ia bergerak seperti nadi

Ia tetap ada. Ia bersifat 'mutual'. 

Selangkah kau kemari untuk Dia, berlari rahmatnya menlindung dan menyanjung

Aku cemburu sama legendarisnya tulisan Shakespeare, 

Walaupun kebodohan Romeo dan Juliet itu; nyata

Ia masih suatu bukti yang cinta itu halus bisa mengawal--

Jiwa, akal dan segala yang kau lepas saat cinta bukan lagi cuma soal hati

Tetapi nyawa.

...

Malam ini janggal; 

Kerana aku menulis tentang orang

Dan bukan kamu. Tapi tetap saja satu saat nanti aku mahu kau tetap ditulis aku. 

Sampai bila bila. Sampai aku mati. 

You have always been the postcard;

And likewise, I'm the waiting.

the art of reading

Since my earliest youth, when it was the time of Ma meeting friends or being out to shopping mall, she would always let me wandering myself around bookstore. And most of the times, she would let me pick one book for my collection. Sometimes, it could be a story book. Sometimes, it could be a graphic dictionary. Thus, I may say books have always been something I 'favourite' since kid. Prolly because Barbie as my another wants was too pricey and we couldn't afford buying one that time. However, I am glad Ma has taught me to read since I was very young at age. 

As I grow up, my surrounding has then built my reading material. I learnt to choose what to read. Of what kind of things I want to know, and what is the best book that would provide me materials I want. From something as fantasy as The Red Riding Hood to something as intense as Mein Kampf, reading sure has taught me a lot about living. And among those people that surround me since I was very young, I guess the eldest Dibby is the one that has contributed a lot to the type of book I read today. 

Reading, to me, is rather called an art. For every book provide a stack of materials one could possess as skills in life. Though I might have read thousands of books, I still wouldn't call myself as a well-read person. It is the one who possess the art of reading and actually uses it can be called as a well-read person. 

By the art of reading, I actually mean something different. It doesn't mean the average reading of typical average people do in normal basis. It is, to be sure, a way of reading throughly and questioning. Of by 'why this and that', making a person insists to know more, subsequently to know deeper and wider. Reading; as the process of obtaining materials shall be organized in one's mind. One can read thousands or even millions of books but rather could not understand the concept being applied to real life basis. They lack of obtaining the true value of material they acquire thus then would make the invaluable input not be retained forever.   

Reading, on the other hand, should have purposes and meanings. One should read not just because the demand of society for him to be called 'intelligentsia' but rather for the nature of him as human being to know better. To be skilled. To be wise. To be independent thinker; who possibly could think big think and not just be left out in a specific parliament. 

As what Hitler has put it into words; we shall bolster up reality by theory and test theory by reality. 

You may read something you want to know, or you may read something you never insisted to know that it then be a bonus you learn something new. And likewise, the art of telling us that we actually were an idiot for not knowing. I guess, it is quite irony, to let us think that we are actually a lifetime idiot so that we could be intellectually humble to know things right at the very most right; not pessimistically limited to our own self-created ideology. 

We read to forget, 

And we forget to keep going. 

About Time

It is, indeed all about time. Of by this minute, I chose to put my glasses on, my cup of coffee asides and all the assignments that are in due away from this study table. I chose to write this 'what I talk about when I talk about; About Time'. I don't do movie review. Not occasionaly. However, this time, I chose to write one, thus moving on to now that I'll be writing the reflection of this movie had on me. 

The movie starts with how Tim at his twenty-one finally be informed about the fact that every man in his family can actually travel in time. The very ordinary orange guy as Tim can actually travel in time; such a definite miracle for a guy who all he wants at that particular time; is love. 

Nah, this won't work. 

But well, I won't review much about how the story goes from one part to another, in fact, I would tell how the movie has got me thinking of something something. 

Honestly speaking, I hate the idea of the movie. It is, in every way, unrealistic; the time travel theme is just nonsense and fucked up. If such thing as time travel does really exist, I would call it as unlogical miracle. And miracle, in the very least of possibility ever, things as magical as that won't just happen. I prefer to stand firmly to the nature of life, its ever changing season that not even one moment can be repeated. One mistake commit, then all it takes to correct it is by never repeating the same mistake. Maybe, this is how the idea of Curtis comes; that mistake shouldn't be repeated but at the replay of the same particular moment. Such a brilliant Curtis. 

All those fantasy potrayals throughout the movie have got me thinking that Tim's love story from the very beginning is somewhat, a fraud. 

Tim has lost his chance once, thus what makes the love true if even by the beginning he already knew what to-do and what not-to? Tim already knew Mary from his first encounter, thus what makes their story true even by the beginning Tim has earned such an extra bonus point of knowing the details of Mary's favourites? 

For Tim to build his ultimate true love story with his girlfriend, quite numerous play and rewind process need to take place thus making me irritated on how true their love story is. However, everything comes in limit. Tim can only change anything he wants before the born of his child, or else he couldn't anticipate the aftermath consequence, this has made Tim to be wise in every decision he might take. Now, this is quite a lesson, that it then requires Tim to be more wiser, smarter and selective in every action he might choose. 

Apart from those play-and-rewind development of plots, I preach for the side themes this movie tries to deliver. The love of family; I find this as classic. Every minute spent by this well-defined perfect family of Tim got me feeling "how beautiful this life could be". Such time spent with loved ones was just too precious, and later after they left us for death, nothing else we could do rather than mesmerizing those old good times once together before. 

In fact, from his very first hit movie Love Actually, I just know damn right that Curtis would always have extra something through his masterpiece. And this About Time is nothing more but another masterpiece of his. Thank you to the one that suggested, that I actually enjoyed myself. 

All in all, out of 10, I personally would give this movie 7 solid. 

 (If by chance, I could travel in time, would I do it?) 

(( Yes, but not to correct any mistakes I've done. 

I would, because sometimes there are times when my life felt so fucked up that I just hope to have the million years to be back and make its rewind. Million years ago; is how I call the past (duhh the number) because both of my present and future could be so hurtful to be living in. I had everything before (not literally) but all those things that suffice my capacity of happiness. I long for comfort I was once had, my laugh without hesitation and my smile that literates the truth as none of concealing.  I miss Ma, I miss when Dibby was still a bachelor and all the friends  I had that I know would always be the only one call away. I miss those times when I feel so secure and excited about days to come. I miss those times when people say they love and they really mean it through words and actions. I miss to have those shoulders that promised to be offered and really be there when I'm in need of one. I miss the truthness of faces that stay with me all the time. For now; it's all confusing that are they really those who would do all their actions through words. I'm suffocating of all the promises they made. ))

All over again, it's about time. I gotta go, and move on. 

Once in awhile

It was a clumsy girlfriends meeting; a typical one you may say but this time one is joined with some random pals. Basically a trio of the day. We took a quick drive to the place. Well, it was a random place picked. Just the place where you know you can have a light chitchat and costs you less bucks.

Cheapskate as you may think, well cheapskate is smart. 

One thing about girls not meeting up for awhile is that; they would get super awkward the first 10 minutes. But by just keep talking about just anything and everything, and and get ourselves chitchat-ive from minute to minute, we would then get the mood. The mood; that we are actually connected and comforted. Of course, we were once connected. So it won't be as hard as it seems, ay? 

This is, by fact, a nature. Once told in a book. 

Facts lived my life. Though not entirely until the theories just won't do anymore, that I might need references. (Well, girls always need references) Thus, by having those active brains and emotional hearts to stress you sometimes; it such a help. Haha. 

We thought we would've barely survived those 2hours of talking while facing to one another, but these girlfriends can actually go aggressive. They needed a day, well at least a night long. Gossiping just cant be stopped, when everything has just about to start! There's too many things not being talked, just yet. Lock us a night, thus a sleepover at Fieqa's. Yay.  

A chitchat. A movie kinda night. A sleepover of trio. We were getting lifeless, we gone live. Haha. 

Being 21 years old girl, living in the most busiest town in the city; well sure life was always a dramatic scene everytime. At least, to us. Juggling around with assignments and life issues, well life is indeed a long tiring journey. (Fun fact: girls always have issues) (we re just cool liddat) Thus, sharing session has always been a golden! 

But. There's a (but), still. This long tiring journey is meant for people of wisdom. And your conscience cant be kept, but to be validated. Asking opinions, not because you are not so much confident. But you are expected to look wider. And deeper. You need someone to agree, as well you need someone to make you disagree. Sometimes. You cant be right all the time. 

At least, not when saying "men are all the same". 

We've grown up wiser, my dear friends. I am blessed to be corrected. I am blessed to be wronged. Thank you, for the least of being true yourself. 

.

.

.

(Have you ever get wondered what actually being talked during girlfriends meeting?)

Well, yes. We talk nothing, but everything under the sun. Just Everything.